Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I have a HUGE dilema...

Sigh...I have a BIG decision that I need to make, but I just don't know what the right thing to do is. I was offered a position as an OT in a local school district. Now normally there would be no way I could work in the schools...usually the pay is crap...but this position has GREAT pay plus a great schedule. I know it sounds great, but here's my dilemma. I currently work at the local hospital and while the pay is good I work 5 days per week all year long and I also have to work some weekends and holidays. But, it is a stable job and relatively easy....I know my place is safe there and I know what I do there. At the school EVERYTHING would be different, I have never work in a school system...in fact in my professional career I have never worked with peds...now I did in my clinicals..but that was 5 years ago. I think the biggest thing is I am terrified of a huge change and feeling like I don't know what I am doing. What happens if I'm really crappy as a school OT? What happens if I can't figure out what I'm supposed to do? What if it all goes to crap and I hate it? Sigh...I need to let them know ASAP as the school year has already started and they need an OT. I so desperately want more time with my family, but I'm so scared. I'm scared to leave the security of an "easy" job where I know the people I work with, I know how to work with adults, I know the paper work, I know how to deal with problems, I just know what I am doing. I am not normally this frightened of change...I usually embrace change and go with the flow...so I don't know what's up now. I think also I fear that I will not make enough money and my family will suffer. I know I could work some PRN in the summer and over vacations, but still there is that what if. My hubby is no help...he just tells me to do what I want...but I don't know what I want. Okay really I just want to quit and stay home...but that is not even an option and I know that. I just wish someone could tell me what I need to do. I'm so afraid of passing up a good chance at more time with my family, but also afraid to leave the familiarity of my current job...HELP

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