Life as a mom

I'm feeling nostalgic tonight I guess...or maybe just procrastinating :) I have found myself looking back at this past year and how amazing this journey has been so far. I can only imagine where things will go from here.

What can I say...I never thought I would enjoy having a little one nearly as much as I do. It truely is an amazing journey that I wouldn’t trade for the world. Since having Mackenzie so many things have changed...things I never thought would change. It amazes me how your prospective on life changes when you now have this little life depending on you day and night. Scary to say the least. Even my relationship with Jason is different. It’s a challenge learning how to not just be a mom, but to balance that with being a wife as well. I love to see Jason playing with Mackenzie. I fall more in love with him each time I see them together. You can see his love for her in his eyes...oh and she is such a daddy’s girl! When she was born I learned a new kind of love, one that I can not explain and could never have understood until I had a child of my own. It’s an overwhelming feeling. Along with that new found love came a sence of anxiety that I had never experienced. How can you worry so much about someone. Even when I knew she was perfectly fine and happy, I worried. It was an anxiety that kept me laying in bed wide awake way too many nights. Thank goodness as she has grown, I have worried less...well maybe learned to deal with it better. When she was tiny I watched her every move...when will she hold her head up, when will she roll over, when will she sit up, etc. Now I watch every move for different reasons. I’m amazed at just shy of 14 months and she is walking like she’s done it her whole life. I love watching as she figures out everyday life, learns to deal with frustration, just learns how her world works. I feel blessed to have been given the opportunity to raise my beautiful little girl. Every day I am thankful that Jason and I have her in our lives...she has made life so much fun.